So it was with some despair that on waking I heard the buses speeding by and felt increased juddering, along with some alarming sounds like the wood in the walls cracking. Immediately my imagination went into overdrive - not a good way to wake up, and all morning I couldn't settle to anything.
Having eaten some chocolates left over from Christmas, and made a second big pot of coffee - and feeling more anxious than ever - I decided to go out and speak to "the guys" and find out what was happening. It was reassuring - there will be a second layer of asphalt, and that will make a difference. (Though the proof of that pudding will be in the eating.)
In the menatime, having spread my gloom and fears to several friends in emails, coincidentally I read this article while having coffee. "A trouble shared is a trouble multiplied" - oh dear!
Anxiety wants to travel from one person to another ...
When it comes to worry and anxiety ... unlike other negative emotions, they seem productive; chewing over a problem feels like doing something about it. And so we’d like others to share our worry: that way, several people will be “working” on the problem. The hitch, of course, is that worry isn’t really productive: usually, it’s a distraction, and leads to lower-quality work.And note this:
Worrying is the practice of trying to reach a state of serenity by engaging in precisely the activity that guarantees you’ll never get there. So you’re hardly helping an anxious person by joining them in this self-defeating spiral.This is the helpful bit:
At [Mike Montiero's] design studio, they have a rule: Stop Adopting Other People’s Anxiety. “Once a client becomes anxious,” Monteiro writes, “their primary goal becomes to make you anxious, because that justifies their own anxiety.”Being calm keeps your worry level in check. Calm and action. What one little thing can you do about it right now - talk to someone? make a list? clear a space? empty a bag? go for a walk?